sublingua

The heart with a mind of its own.

(Be present.)

The mind with a heart of its own.

(It's past.)

The dream that is your waking life.

(Go there now.)

Demons In Love (The Demon Wedding)
Friday, May. 28, 2004

I have, like, ten minutes to record this day, this big day of NicI's wedding (almost typed "weeding").

So, I didn't go with the dress, but with a black linen skirt that ruffles at the hem and a black sweater, black hose, new black shoes (a purchase made this a.m. while I was shopping for NicI's wedding gift at Target, where her bridal registry is). I dyed my hair ("natural black")(Yeah, right). (And the other night The Demon Who Always Does The Right Thing told me about The Demon Grrlfriend's comment that a woman who dresses all in black and, as I have in the past, compares herself to Johnny Cash, is a big fat lesbian. It's in the rule book, I guess.) I went to the gym and worked out, came home, showered, did my hair and makeup, and now I'm at Max's place picking up a pair of pants for him as he spilled coffee on his this morning.

So, I didn't go with the vase for NicI's gift, but rather perused her Target bridal registry gift list and settled on some knives that she had chosen. I like the idea of giving knives for a wedding gift. My usual gift, when I am left to my own devices, is something with a timer on it (you know, since most marriages have a built-in time limit) or monogramed his & her hip flasks. But knives? I can dig it. They'll be brandishing them at one another before long anyway.

I did dinner with Max at The Demon Couple's house last night. After dinner, we watched Kill Bill, which I hadn't seen before. And? Eh. Only mid-level Tarantino-wise, although I did love the scene where Go-Go gets killed. And Go-Go did deliver my favorite line, which was, "You call that begging?" (The Demon Grrlfriend piped up, "You can use that line, Sublingua.") I also liked the scene in the (sushi) bar, when Black Mambo orders sake. The Demon asked, "Did you understand that?" (referring to the Japanese that was being spoken). I said, "Some of it," (four years of Japanese study comes back to haunt me from time to time), then added, "I got the part about the sake anyway." They laughed appreciatively.

I also spent most of yesterday helping x move his shit into storage so that he can jet off to DC for the summer. He has a lot of shit for a guy who, when I met him, had a bowl and a spoon and slept either on the floor or on the pass bar between the kitchen and front room of his studio apartment. He did a lot of crazy things while I was helping, like dust off each piece of furniture as it was being loaded into the truck to be placed in storage in the garage of his parents' new house. Anyway, I enjoyed helping (all the lifting pays off), he bought me lunch, I got to meet his stepfather, and got a bit of quality x time in before he leaves. I'll miss x for the three months he'll be gone. I do love that boy.

And now it's time for me to go and pick up Max and watch my friend throw away her life--er, I mean, get married to her longtime companion. Wish all involved luck, my little demons.

Updated to add:

�I always expected her to marry some guy who would keep her in the manner she�s always wanted to become accustomed to.� �Sophistica, commenting on another friend�s impending marriage.

The wedding? It was everything you really want in a wedding: The ceremony was brief, a bit corny, sweet. The bride was radiant in her ivory-and-peach beaded gown with the corsetry pulling her figure into a perfect hourglass. The groom looked like every other groom (that is, as if someone had plucked him off the street at random, put him in a penguin suit, and beaned him in the head with a shovel just moments before the ceremony). The maid of honor wore an appropriately un-attention-getting lavender dress. The pastor/minister delivered his lines without stumbling, the harpist was a bit out of tune, the father beamed proudly walking his daughter down the aisle, the couple looked alternatively nervous and divinely happy with their respective choice(s). NicI tripped coming down the stairs after lighting the �unity candle� (whatever the hell that is), but they delivered their personalized vows like champs.

A beautiful NicI (a characteristic expression).

The reception was held in a comfortably-sized room at a hotel downtown and there was the requisite chicken, beef, or vegetarian options served to my little table by a waiter who is sure to learn English if he sticks with those night-school classes. I sat in a booth with The Demon Who Always Does The Right Thing and The Demon Grrlfriend and Max. There was a small cake (thankfully sans the little Barbie and Ken in wedding wear perched on top) and champagne. The usual games were played with the bouquet and garter, the best man delivered a touching speech about his best friend for the last 29 years having made a wonderful choice, the maid-of-honor (NicI�s sister, her cleavage popping out of her dress) tried her hand at toasting and failed charmingly but was saved by NicI�s toast to her parents and to love. The couple danced their first dance as a married couple as though they had made it through their first six lessons at Arthur Murray and then quit, having decided that they knew just enough to count to four and twirl. The bride�s dance with her father (who looked as though he was this close to popping a vest button, he was so proud) was truly touching. I delivered my gift of knives and came home with the wedding favors (matchbooks and a personalized CD of the couple�s favorite songs) and a big bouquet of roses and lilies. (�Take them, please,� NicI implored as we left. �We�re leaving for our honeymoon and everyone else is from out of town.�)

There were only a few bad moments. One of them, sadly, was mine, and occurred when the food was delivered to the table. I had banked and saved enough points for a small dinner and some cake, but The Demon (who often teases me about food) started in on the subject of food when a bread basket arrived at our table. I don�t eat bread under the best of circumstances, so there were only a few comments along the lines of �Not even one roll?� and �This one has seeds in it. Those are really good for you,� and �Here, have some butter. You need it.� I weathered those comments all right as our salads (iceberg lettuce, a cucumber slice or two, and a wedge of tomato) were delivered almost immediately after, so I didn�t have to sit there with my hands in my lap while everyone else pigged out on rolls. After the salads were cleared, our plates were delivered and the beans were found to be cooked in bacon and the chicken covered in a kind of sauce with pine nuts on top. �There isn�t a lot you can eat on this plate, is there, Sublingua?� she said. I agreed. And then the real teasing broke out. I don�t remember exactly what was said, but it was a combination of the familiar, �Is that all you�re going to eat?� and �Here, have some of [insert food I don�t/won�t/can�t eat without it triggering a binge]. It�s just a little bit.� I ate a bit of what I could eat and bantered back in a slightly aggressive manner. It must have gotten a bit more aggressive than I meant it to, because The Demon Grrlfriend at one point said to The Demon, �Just backhand her.� Finally, it got to the point where I lost my cool, said, �It really stresses me out to eat crap,� slid out of the booth, and went out to the hotel lobby to have a cigarette.

Dinner remains.

That was one moment. (More on the resolution in a bit.)

One moment belonged to The Demon and Ama The Demon Ex-Grrlfriend, who showed up (late, and only to the reception) with a date/ringer, and came over to be introduced to The Demon Grrlfriend. She stood awkwardly at the table but was not invited to sit, so she plopped herself down next to The Demon Grrlfriend (to whom I said later, �Well, that was an interesting move,� to which The Demon Grrlfriend replied, �She was doing that guy thing where they spread their legs and take up as much space as possible�). She and The Ringer had to sit at the next table over, next to some guy who never shut up and kept introducing topics and asking questions of a polite but seething Ama, who is not verbose under the best of circumstances. It didn�t seem to faze the guy, and we all had a good time listening in on the awkward conversation. Then the dancing began.

The Demon Grrlfriend said she was waiting for some Dwight Yoakum to take The Demon for a spin around the dance floor, but she gladly showed me how to two-step in the corner during another song (my favorite moment of the night perhaps as she leads beautifully).

A two-step lesson.

And the next song was Dwight. The Demon and Grrlfriend got up to dance and did�a proposition which had made The Demon nervous to consider because she used to take a lot of shit from Ama when they were together for being �a white girl who can�t dance.�

Later: I just want to let this entry go, so I�ll end it here and leave the rest up to you to figure out.

retreat or surrender

More lies:
Waking Sleeping Demons II - Sunday, Oct. 30, 2011
Waking Sleeping Demons - Saturday, Oct. 29, 2011
time - Friday, May. 20, 2011
- - Wednesday, Oct. 06, 2010
The Return - Tuesday, Oct. 05, 2010

� sublingua sublingua.diaryland.com.